Wednesday, April 23, 2014

I'm Not Okay




I saw this picture and it really just looked like a poem, ya know? 
So, here's my late night rambling of a poem-thing. 
(Sorry - this isn't a happy ending poem as of right now. :) It didn't flow right to continue into that, so it is what it is.)


 I'm Not Okay 
4/22/14

That unguarded moment
When my shield
Drops -
And there you are.
Are you okay?”
You saw my frown
And the way my shoulders sagged
'Cause I thought
No one was watching...
While at the same time I was wishing
Someone would notice.
I'm fine
Just tired.”
My practiced smile falls into place
As I list
All the reasons why
I'm fine
Just
A little tired right now.
Those entangled words
Slip past my lips.
Part truth -
Oh,
But mostly not.
I think you believe me;
If you didn't
You'd probably try to probe
Deeper.
You're good at it,
But I never give you that chance.
See,
We all have those words.
Those words
We hide behind
At the times
We are the lowest.
What are your words?
Mine are these,
Clear as day,
But you don't see them
For what they really are.
But that's my fault.
I've gotten really good at pretending.
Heh,
So good that half the time
You wouldn't even know
I'm repeating in my head,
It's okay.
I'm okay.
It's okay.
I'm okay.”
Over and over
To stop my other thoughts
From sinking me
Deeper than I want to go.
I don't often let my guard slip
Low enough for you to see...
But
Despite all this...
I want you
To chase behind the words,
"I'm fine."
To see
If the words are real
Or
If they're an empty shield.
Please...
But right now
All I do is smile and laugh
While we dance around
The truth...
I'm not okay.
I'm ready
To give up
If I have to...
But please
If I really have to
Will you
Please stay with me?

~ZA



2 comments:

  1. It's wonderful! Very relatable. Mind if I share it on G+ and/or FB?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. *Smiles quietly* I'm glad ya like it, Kya.

      ^_^ I'd be very pleased if you reshared it.

      ~ZA

      Delete

It always makes me smile to see that someone has been over to my little blog. Thanks for visiting! :D

~ZA
Zeal Aspiring